I am currently lying on my back, on a couch, in an apartment, in Philadelphia, on my Curtis audition date. It is 2:36 AM, and my body refuses to go back to sleep. My mind also refuses to do anything but think about what is going to happen in t-minus 7 hours.
In a perfect world, I will walk in wearing high heels, my head high, and my cheekbones higher. I’ve dressed to impress, I’ve sung melodies spun with gold and diamonds, and they offer me acceptance on the spot.
Also, I don’t have a zit on my upper left lip.
Positive visualization works for me. It really helps, much like Harold Hill promised it would in “The Music Man”. And the thing is – and I say this in sincerity and not pride – I truly know I’m Curtis material. That’s not positive wishing either; I really am exactly the kind of person they’re looking for. I know it. And if not for undergrad, then grad school. Tomorrow is just the beginning of a love affair with this place… I can feel it in my bones.
Back to reality. I’m an insomniac attempting sleep on a couch, consequently sneezing, battling a nasty sore throat, and I do have a zit on my upper left lip. I have the biggest audition of my life in 7 hours. In front of faculty, current Curtis prodigies and godlike singing students, and complete strangers. Also, my pinky toe is swollen enough to make wearing high heels nothing but a bunion in the making.
Oddly, I am okay with all of this. With the exception of the sore throat. I am so excited this day has finally arrived, I wish I could get up off this leather pillow and do it all right now! Even if I do not make finals, I knowthat I will have given my bet, and that is really what matters… As my former Governator would say, “Ill be back.” :) and I will be. I
it’s all up to The Big Guy now. Everything in his hands.
And I gotta say– Its such a relief and load off my back to know He’s got it a under control! Even if I can’t see it now, I know He’a faithful. And THAT, my friends, is exactly what gets me through the days … lip zit and all.